Tonight I was changing out an infusion set, and because it was a new set that I'm not accustomed to I asked for a little help from my boyfriend (we live together). I had him hold the set while I maneuvered the tape over it. While he was waiting for his cue to jump in and help inserted the needle and cannula, which of course was a stubborn one that i had to really press hard to get it in my skin. Now, he has seen me 'do' this a hundred if not thousand times, so it was no surprise, but he had never been right there looking that closely as I did it. It was quiet, I was doing my thing like it was no big deal and he said "you're brave." I ignored him because right as he spoke the needle popped in and I needed his help. After we finished I sad down and though about how hearing that really stuck with me. "I am brave." What a line for a diabetic to hear. To us, it's not bravery, it's not being bold, it's not liking needles, or even just being okay with them...it's survival. This doesn't mean I didn't like the comment, it for once was a comment about diabetes that I actually enjoyed hearing, it was rather flattering...even though I didn't agree with it.
So what I'm pondering now is how people view what we do? The simple things, the testing, the shots, the infusion set changes, the carb counting, the lows, the hights. I get a lot of different reactions as I'm sure all diabetics do. Without mentioning names here are a few:
1. Often I get the "WOW I could never do that!" then I reply "yes you could, if you had to" then i get something like "no really i'd just end up dying, I just couldn't do it"
Needless to say hearing this really pisses me off! So they're telling me that if they were in my shoes they'd choose death? hm, unlikely don't you think? *sigh*
2. One person in particular always cringes and is disgusted (in a 'nice' way). Saying things like "omg omg omg how do you do that? eeeeewww, wow, that sucks" and so on and so forth. This is my leas favorite, and I almost always snap back at them, granted they do have a real phobia of needles.
3. There's always the people that just stare wide eyed, then look up and smile politely
4. and lastly i'll mention the people who pretend it isn't happening, when I test, bolus on my pump, take a shot, read a label, calculate. I like those reactions haha :) Sometimes I just want to be treated like another human being!
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
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4 comments:
My least fav is the "I could NEVER do that!" I just look at them and day, "Never say never." I mean, did my mom ever think she could give her 4 year old shots every day?? NO WAY! But she did it. Cause she had to. But the time I got old enough, it was just part of life. But also a part I knew I'd DIE if I didn't.
I don't really look at it as bravery either. It's just life.
you can live normal life with diabetes , all you need to do is follow doctor's recommendations and fight with it darely
I get these comments quite a bit too. OMG, I hate needles. Or, OMG I could never do that... etc. I'm like, if it was life or death, I think you could find a way.
Oh, did I mention it took me about 30 minutes to give myself the first injection when I had to start insulin? I'm such a baby. ;)
It would be funny to see their faces when I come upon a gusher.
I think that is a wonderful comment your boyfriend made as I think my siblings and yes even my husband who I love dearly truly don't get my daily struggles or how it is such a 24/7 disease that effects us all so deeply. The constant threat of complications, etc. I feel most people think ahhh you had a high or sorry about your low, I don't feel they truly understand how it effects us physically and emotionally, but your boyfriend's comment of you are brave shows a true understanding in my opinion. Great post.
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